So ive been thinking for a while why do people create blogs? and thought thought to myself well screw it ill do one myself.
Things have been a bit bad recently, about two months ago i had the great news that my brothers girlfriend had given birth to a healthy baby girl - ella grace, i was over the moon as was the rest of my family. Then a week a so later (friday 13th) we all decided to go up to wellingborough to see ella and have a hold.
Things were going well, my mum, dad and bandit (my dog) were in my dads car while my two aunties and my nan were in my car. The drive was going well my aunties and nan had cracked open the beers and we were all having a joke and a laugh. Just as we going through monmouth tunnels by the boarding school and my nan said " Friday the 13th has always been lucky for me" at this point the car infront of me slammed on its breaks and i swerved but couldn't avoid and hit the mazda in front.
At this point everyone was ok and i was trying to get my belt off but couldn't quite grasp it (as you will find out this actually saved my life) when a ford focus hit from behind at about 50 mph. This was horrible likely my auntie in the front had opened her door and we could get out as the other doors had buckled.... My nan was not good
It was the worst feeling i have ever had in my life i thought my nan was going to die right there but the firecrew managed to cut her out and rush her to hospital where she partially pulled through. However at this point my head was full of guilt and in my opinion rightly so as its my responsibilty for what happens to the car and it's passengers.
She managed to pull through partially and was sent home from hospital but she wasn't good and i felt guilty everytime i thought about it. To make matters worse i kept having flashblacks which i do to this day and was not sleeping well.
For reasons related to the acident unfortunatley my nan died which was a horrible experience to see however we all had fun at the funeral which i know sounds bad but we all had a few drinks played snooker and skittles under two teams named after her favourite drinks - whisky and lemonade (which i was on ) and vodka and tonic. Unfortunatley we lost much to toms fault after gettng 6 off 9 rolls. However i was pleased with my contribution top scoring with 20. Also beating dan in a game of skittles as he said it he was certain to thrash me at.
I still feel guilty and i still believe that it was partially my fault, i still get some flashbacks but starting to sleep better. R.I.P nan....
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1 comment:
Hi Simon, I know its bloody difficult and I cannot imagine what you are going through but you have to stop blaming yourself!
You did not cause the accident.
And I know your Nanna would not want you to be thinking like this.
If you ever need some space or just to get away, you are always welcome here (although you always break stuff!!)
Love from Sam and Big hugs from Ella Grace x x
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